Me vs The Cinema

To me going to the cinema has always been an exciting experience regardless of the movie. I love the atmosphere when you arrive, the ridiculously expensive confectionary which we all moan about but still spend our hard earned pennies on, the trailers before the film, the movie itself and finally the moment once we leave the screen and automatically turn into film critics.

I have some fond memories of various cinemas and can remember experiences like they were yesterday.  I remember when I was 7 going to watch ‘Ghostbusters 2’ for Arnold’s birthday. I even think he had a Ghostbusters jumper (so jealous)! I remember leaving that film and all of us pretending we were not scared. I’ll be honest, that guy in the painting still gives me nightmares!

I remember going to Wincanton Cinema to watch ‘Back to the Future 2’ with Dad. This was a smaller cinema and only ever had 10-15 people viewing each film. It was useful to have it in the town but the sound was about the same quality as playing music through a mobile phone. However, despite this it was great to walk out of that cinema with Dad having both witnessed a phenomenal film which showed us a glimpse of the future (still no hoverboards).

So as I’ve got older I have been to the Cinema on numerous occasions all over the world but nothing could prepare me for the Middle East experience. Ok, so I knew films would be censored and some films would not even be shown at all, but my negative experiences have come from something completely different.

I first went to the Cinema in Qatar to see Avatar with some good friends. Obviously it was busy as the film was new and as the lights went down the room was illuminated with the screens of Blackberry’s and iPhones. The room then became a chorus of various ringtones at which point I thought these people would panic and quickly turn their phones off in embarrassment. Did this happen? Of course not! These people answered their phones and just sat there talking as if they were watching a film in their living room. We all looked at each other in disbelief and decided to stare directly at these people and give the odd sshhhhh. That would surely work! BUT NO!!!!! People were chatting walking around in the screen, leaving after 5 minutes, leaving mid film and even new people arriving 5 minutes from the end. This became the norm at every film we went to however some films had different problems. My favourite was seeing 5 and 6 year old children arriving to watch ‘Nightmare on Elm Street’ at 10.30pm which is obviously an unsuitable time for children to be up, let alone the film being extremely graphic and violent.

When we arrived in Kuwait I knew that there would be a few films being released that needed a cinema visit. The first we saw was ‘Captain America’ and I was incredibly excited. We went to Muhallab Mall as it is only 5 minutes away and it was Friday lunchtime so in theory there would be hardly anybody there. In the screen were Viv and myself, another couple and one family with three kids. 30 minutes into the film and the Kuwait experience was good, in fact great! But then a sign must have appeared saying that if you run and play in front of the screen you will win a prize. These pesky (word stolen from Scooby-Doo) kids were a nightmare!! I did my usual, mumble bad words under my breath and said that I was going to complain if it didn’t stop (I never do!). We sat there for about another 30 minutes watching these children become part of the film. To be honest it was actually funny seeing a child stood in front of Captain America’s special place. They then must have got tired as they left the cinema and allowed us to enjoy the phenomenal finale!

On Thursday we went to see ‘The Avengers’ which if you haven’t seen, is probably the best superhero movie ever made or at least equal to ‘The Dark Knight’. We saw it in IMAX 3D at 360 Mall. It was packed there and many people arrived late but for the first time in 3 years I felt as if I could have been in any cinema in the world. People were cheering, clapping and gasping at the action. Mobile phone rings were limited and no children were let loose to wreak havoc! It was a near perfect movie experience to the point that I am trying to convince Viv to go and watch it again. She will, I always win when it comes to the cinema.

The moral to this post is:

1. Be prepared to get annoyed at the cinema in the Middle East

2. Be prepared for key parts of the film to be cut out (kissing, girls boobies etc)

3. Buy a Ghostbusters jumper (or knit your own)

4. Hoverboards aren’t real

Andy